Joke of the day

Share your jokes and funny campfire stories with us here.
Forum rules
Please keep it light hearted enol. No serious stufs hey! :)

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We are trying to make the technical information more visible in the Active Topics section. So we are trying to combine all the humour posts into a single thread. This will then more or less always stay on the active topics page if you keep appending your jokes onto this single thread. Your assistance will be greatly appreciated
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MOFASA
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Re: SAP.

Post by MOFASA »

Typical cops, always there to clean up the K_K.....
But never in time to stop it........... :surrender:
Live Life in the FAST lane....
Forget the past, Embrace the FUTURE!!!!
To 4x4 or not to 4x4 thats the question....
IT'S A JEEP :yahoo: ..... You wouldn't understand....
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I had enough of taxi’s

Post by Taljaag »

:thumbup:
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Life is Easy.....! It's the freakin' people that make it difficult!
Zandyl
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Re: How people eat chicken

Post by Zandyl »

Donkey wrote::mocking: I've seen this :shock2: :lmao:

Nope, i think you've done that :tease: :tease:
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MOFASA
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Re: How people eat chicken

Post by MOFASA »

Hoppy wrote:wrong, in the last one, the "Streetwise two" box should be lying in the street
Right hear the dustbin thats less than 5M away.... :slap:
Live Life in the FAST lane....
Forget the past, Embrace the FUTURE!!!!
To 4x4 or not to 4x4 thats the question....
IT'S A JEEP :yahoo: ..... You wouldn't understand....
ImageImageImage[rimg=206x128]
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MOFASA
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Re: I had enough of taxi’s

Post by MOFASA »

I WONT ONE :drool: :drool: :drool:

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
Live Life in the FAST lane....
Forget the past, Embrace the FUTURE!!!!
To 4x4 or not to 4x4 thats the question....
IT'S A JEEP :yahoo: ..... You wouldn't understand....
ImageImageImage[rimg=206x128]
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Re: How people eat chicken

Post by george »

I am more Indian than I think.
"The World is a book, and those who do not travel read only a page.-Saint Augustine"
Thabogrobler
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Re: How people eat chicken

Post by Thabogrobler »

george wrote:I am more Indian than I think.
x2!!!
'02 KZ 'Lux. Cooled. Chipped. Onca'd. Cherished!

If you are a diesel fan, raise your hand.
If you aren't raising your hand, raise your standards!

A 4x4 is merely a machine that enables you to get stuck further away from civilization.
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HennieO
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Bieber has Gupta-connections

Post by HennieO »

Gotta love Fred Mouton!
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Ali3n
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Re: Bieber has Gupta-connections

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
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Re: How people eat chicken

Post by Ali3n »

Me is Indian...
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
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Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Re: I had enough of taxi’s

Post by Ali3n »

:naah:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
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Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Re: SAP.

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Re: New Kitty Toy.......

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
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Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
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Ali3n
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Re: Telephone call

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
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Ali3n
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Re: Reality.

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
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Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
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Ali3n
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Re: House Breaking

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
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Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Re: Justin Bieber in Cape Town.

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
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Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
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Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Secrecy Bill

Post by Ali3n »

Secrecy bill.gif
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Re: Bank Robbery

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Re: Rugby in Heaven

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Borntofish
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Marriage

Post by Borntofish »

Image
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Ali3n
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Re: Signs

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao: Thanks Oom Andy
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
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Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Re: Priority disorders

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Re: Pets.

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Location: Roodepoort

Re: Marriage

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Borntofish
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Gedenksteen

Post by Borntofish »

Jan sterf.

Sy boedel voorsien R140,000 vir ‘n ordentlike begrafnis.

Toe die laaste persone die begrafnis verlaat, wend sy vrou, Sannie haar tot haar beste vriendin.
'Wel, ek voel seker Jan sou tevrede gewees het, sê sy.’
'Verseker,' stem Berta in. Sy fluister in Sannie se oor: 'Hoeveel het die gedoente gekos?'

'|Honderd-en-veertig duisend vir die hele spul.'

'Kannie wees nie!' roep Berta uit. 'Dis was baie spesiaal, maar R140 000?'

Sannie verduidelik: 'Die begrafnis was R6 500; ek het R500 aan die kerk geskenk; die whiskey, wyn en snoeperye was nog R500; en die res gaan vir die gedenksteen.'
Berta werk vinnig uit: 'R132,500 vir ‘n gedenksteen? Hoe groot is die ding?'

Sien foto hieronder...
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Image
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Ali3n
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Re: Gorilla Remover........

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Re: Gedenksteen

Post by Ali3n »

:shock2: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
User avatar
Ali3n
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Re: Was that your cat

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Re: The Four Cats

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
User avatar
Ali3n
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Re: The Hungry Monkey

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
User avatar
Ali3n
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Location: Roodepoort

Re: Sniffer

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
User avatar
Ali3n
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Posts: 4714
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Location: Roodepoort

Re: Talking Parrots

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
User avatar
Ali3n
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Re: Man & Wife at the Zoo

Post by Ali3n »

:blackeye:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
User avatar
Ali3n
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Posts: 4714
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Re: Tweeling seuns......

Post by Ali3n »

Ag shame man... Arme kinders... :taunt:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
User avatar
Ali3n
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Posts: 4714
Joined: Mon Sep 27, 2010 2:06 pm
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Location: Roodepoort

Re: How to give a cat a pill

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
User avatar
Ali3n
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Posts: 4714
Joined: Mon Sep 27, 2010 2:06 pm
Town: Roodepoort
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Location: Roodepoort

Re: Lying on his death bed.......

Post by Ali3n »

:blackeye: :blackeye:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
User avatar
Ali3n
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Joined: Mon Sep 27, 2010 2:06 pm
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Re: What MOM taught you.

Post by Ali3n »

I didn't have a mother when I grew up, Suddenly I realise how much I have missed...
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Ali3n
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Posts: 4714
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Re: Land Rover...

Post by Ali3n »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
PRESENTLY DISADVANTAGED
ImageImageImage Link BrokenImageImage Link Broken
Custom built Rock Sliders, Bumpers, Belly protection.... Anything you can think of
Cell: 076 122 3744 E-Mail: fpanaino@gmail.com
Bear Grylls calls it "Ultimate Survival", overlanders call it "Camping"
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Bugzy
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Re: What MOM taught you.

Post by Bugzy »

"Dit gaan eendag terugkom na jou toe!!"
Maar sy het nie gese X10 nie - sy het die waarheid vir my weg gesteek!!
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Hoppy
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Re: Pets.

Post by Hoppy »

An Angel.jpg
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The trouble with trouble is...it always starts as fun.
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Re: I knew, deep down was something good...................

Post by Ali3n »

:thumbup:
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How Many??????

Post by Pora »

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Re: How Many??????

Post by Ford Danger »

Too many in SA.....
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Re: I knew, deep down was something good...................

Post by Ford Danger »

Asuming that bar is closed for repairs a lot!
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Re: What MOM taught you.

Post by Ford Danger »

Think this was written by my mother :laugh2:
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Re: Lying on his death bed.......

Post by Ford Danger »

:laugh2: :lmao: :laugh2:
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Re: How to give a cat a pill

Post by Ford Danger »

:lmao: :laugh2: :laugh2:
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Re: The Hungry Monkey

Post by Ford Danger »

:laugh2: :laugh2: :laugh2: :laugh2:
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Re: Gorilla Remover........

Post by Ford Danger »

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
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Re: Bank Robbery

Post by Ford Danger »

:laugh2: :laugh2: :laugh2:
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Re: Wonderlike pil

Post by Ford Danger »

:lmao: :lmao: :laugh2:
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Re: The small flaw.....

Post by Ford Danger »

:laugh2: :laugh2: :laugh2: :lmao:
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Re: How to give a cat a pill

Post by Die$eL »

:lmao:
just get a dog...
Real drivers use three pedals
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The game

Post by Bushwacker »

A young boy walks into a barber shop. The barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you!"

The barber then takes out a dollar bill and two quarters. He asks the young boy, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the two quarters and leaves.

"What did I tell you?" the barber says. "Poor kid never learns!"

The customer leaves after his haircut and sees the same young boy walking out of an ice cream shop. "Can I ask you a question?" he says to the boy. "Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"

The boy licks his ice cream cone and replies, "The day I take the dollar, the game is over!"
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Dit gaan swaar...

Post by Bushwacker »

Elke dag stap 'n man verby 'n bedelaar en gee hom tien rand. So gaan dit aan vir 'n jaar, maar skielik verander die daaglikse donasie na vyf rand.

"En nou meneer," vra die bedelaar. "Waarom krimp jou donasie aan my nou so skielik?"

"Wel," antwoord die man, "My oudste seun het universiteit toe gegaan. Dit kos baie geld, so ek moes my uitgawes sny."

"En hoeveel kinders het meneer?" vra die bedelaar.

"Vier" antwoord die man.

"O," se die bedelaar "Ek hoop net nie jy is van plan om hulle almal op my f@#$%^ onkoste te laat studeer nie!"
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Don't you just love lawyers...

Post by Bushwacker »

A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper, Guido, has cheated him out of $10,000,000.00.

His bookkeeper is deaf. That was the reason he got the job in the first place. It was assumed that Guido would hear nothing and would therefore never have to testify in court.

When the Godfather goes to confront Guido about the missing $10 million, he takes along his lawyer, who knows sign language. The Godfather tells the lawyer, "Ask him where the money is."

The lawyer, using sign language, asks Guido, Where's the money?

Guido signs back, "I don't know what you are talking about."

The lawyer tells the Godfather, "He says he doesn't know what you are talking about."

The Godfather pulls out a pistol, puts it to Guido's head and says, "Ask him again or I'll kill him!"

The lawyer signs to Guido, "He'll kill you if you don't tell him."

Guido trembles and signs back, "OK! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed at my cousin Bruno's house."

The Godfather asks the lawyer, "What did he say?"

The lawyer replies, "He says you don't have the balls to pull the trigger."
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HKGK

Post by KOBUSL »

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Word te vinnig oud en te stadig wys.
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Re: HKGK

Post by Ali3n »

:blink: :blink: :blackeye:
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Re: HKGK

Post by Thunder02 »

She's going to need more than one role :lol: :lol: :lol:
Not all those who wander are lost!

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