CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD
To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
Date: 2009-05-27, 1 :43 a.m. E.S.T.
I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.
First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!
I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].
After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!
I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]
I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.
Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line - although I only used the phone for a little over a day now - what 's going on? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.
The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).
;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.Have a good day!
Thoughtfully yours,
Alex
Revenge is soooo sweet
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Please keep it light hearted enol. No serious stufs hey! :)
We are trying to make the technical information more visible in the Active Topics section. So we are trying to combine all the humour posts into a single thread. This will then more or less always stay on the active topics page if you keep appending your jokes onto this single thread. Your assistance will be greatly appreciated
Please keep it light hearted enol. No serious stufs hey! :)
We are trying to make the technical information more visible in the Active Topics section. So we are trying to combine all the humour posts into a single thread. This will then more or less always stay on the active topics page if you keep appending your jokes onto this single thread. Your assistance will be greatly appreciated
- Bosfebok
- LR 4WD Full Lockers
- Posts: 870
- Joined: Thu Oct 01, 2009 8:55 am
- Town: Roodekrans
- Vehicle: 1995 Hilux Raider 2.2
- Real Name: Otto
- Club VHF Licence: X248
- Location: Roodekrans
Revenge is soooo sweet
Otto X248
1995 Hilux Raider 2.2 EFI Turbo DC
Alucab Canopy with Kitchen and Recovery sections
National Luna Split Charge system and Dual Battery
80W solar panel and MPPT controller
20.5" LED BAR
5ton tow bar with recovery points
Nudge-M front bumper
80l Long Range Fuel Tank
90l Water Tank
Slide Drawer System
Safari Snorkel
Double Lockers - Toyota Electric selectable
Diff breathers
The worst anti hi-jack alarm system ever, SANJI!!
A bad day out is still better than a good day in!!
1995 Hilux Raider 2.2 EFI Turbo DC
Alucab Canopy with Kitchen and Recovery sections
National Luna Split Charge system and Dual Battery
80W solar panel and MPPT controller
20.5" LED BAR
5ton tow bar with recovery points
Nudge-M front bumper
80l Long Range Fuel Tank
90l Water Tank
Slide Drawer System
Safari Snorkel
Double Lockers - Toyota Electric selectable
Diff breathers
The worst anti hi-jack alarm system ever, SANJI!!
A bad day out is still better than a good day in!!
-
- Monster Truck
- Posts: 5906
- Joined: Fri May 18, 2007 7:12 pm
- Town: Pretoria
- Vehicle: '96 D/C Raider
- Real Name: Bennie
- Location: Doornpoort
Re: Revenge is soooo sweet
Mmm this is starting to look like a DSTV rerun
viewtopic.php?f=15&t=9090&p=97301#p97301
viewtopic.php?f=15&t=8610&p=92678#p92678
viewtopic.php?f=15&t=9090&p=97301#p97301
viewtopic.php?f=15&t=8610&p=92678#p92678
- Hoppy
- Monster Truck
- Posts: 5784
- Joined: Mon Jan 07, 2008 10:15 pm
- Town: Cape Town
- Vehicle: Hilux SFA & IFS
- Real Name: Allan 0721291160
Re: Revenge is soooo sweet
I've recorded lots of stuff on discovery etc. on my hard drive, after editting you'll be lucky to get more than 12 minutes viewing on a 30min program.
aev@iburst.co.za
The trouble with trouble is...it always starts as fun.
The most precious jewels you will ever wear around your neck is the arms of your children...
" I WOULD RATHER SIT ON THE TAILGATE OF MY HILUX WITH A BEER AND A CHOP, WATCHING A FIRE, THAN DINE IN THE BEST RESTAURANT IN TOWN "
- Bosfebok
- LR 4WD Full Lockers
- Posts: 870
- Joined: Thu Oct 01, 2009 8:55 am
- Town: Roodekrans
- Vehicle: 1995 Hilux Raider 2.2
- Real Name: Otto
- Club VHF Licence: X248
- Location: Roodekrans
Re: Revenge is soooo sweet
Sorry gents... I did not do a search first before I posted it
Otto X248
1995 Hilux Raider 2.2 EFI Turbo DC
Alucab Canopy with Kitchen and Recovery sections
National Luna Split Charge system and Dual Battery
80W solar panel and MPPT controller
20.5" LED BAR
5ton tow bar with recovery points
Nudge-M front bumper
80l Long Range Fuel Tank
90l Water Tank
Slide Drawer System
Safari Snorkel
Double Lockers - Toyota Electric selectable
Diff breathers
The worst anti hi-jack alarm system ever, SANJI!!
A bad day out is still better than a good day in!!
1995 Hilux Raider 2.2 EFI Turbo DC
Alucab Canopy with Kitchen and Recovery sections
National Luna Split Charge system and Dual Battery
80W solar panel and MPPT controller
20.5" LED BAR
5ton tow bar with recovery points
Nudge-M front bumper
80l Long Range Fuel Tank
90l Water Tank
Slide Drawer System
Safari Snorkel
Double Lockers - Toyota Electric selectable
Diff breathers
The worst anti hi-jack alarm system ever, SANJI!!
A bad day out is still better than a good day in!!
-
- Monster Truck
- Posts: 5906
- Joined: Fri May 18, 2007 7:12 pm
- Town: Pretoria
- Vehicle: '96 D/C Raider
- Real Name: Bennie
- Location: Doornpoort
Re: Revenge is soooo sweet
Dont worry we are just teasing you ;)
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29856
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Revenge is soooo sweet
Otto, when you post a hillarious joke and there are few or no responses, you can safely guess that it's done the rounds already, but if you get a flurry of emoticons, you've hit a home run!
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!